Although a breakup with a boyfriend or with a girlfriend can be really depressing, it doesn't need to mean the relationship's over.
Even if the breakup suddenly left you feeling "dazed and confused" and lonely, you may still really feel like healing the wounds and jumping right back into that relationship with your ex.
If you're asking yourself "How can I get my ex back?" then there are some things you need to know.
If you learn how to react following a break-up, and you become aware of how not to strain the relationship even further, then getting your ex back will be easier than ever.
It can seem difficult to keep up a cheery attitude throughout your day following a break-up, but relationship experts believe an optimistic and confident attitude can go a long way.
First, keep your confidence.
If you are asking "how can I get my ex back?", then remain confident. Rather than going around feeling gloomy and feeling sorry for yourself, try to find ways that you can keep yourself occupied and happy. Keep the depression out of your demeanor. Allow your ex to know that you're strong and more than capable of handling such an emotional situation. It'll also show them (and you) that you're capable of surviving on your own as well.
Second, remain socially active.
If getting your ex back is your primary focus, surround yourself with well wishers, positive attitudes and good friends. Show your ex that people appreciate you, and that they love having you around. As more people begin to feel good about your presence in their lives, your ex will begin to see you in a completely new light. He or she will realize that, yes, you are a good person they simply cannot afford to let go of. This is one of the best ways to let your ex notice you in a new light.
Maintain your appearance.
Another solution to "How can I get my ex back?" is not to let your appearance reflect your situation. You need to pay attention to every detail of your looks, including your clothes, your make up, your hair, your stride, your shoes and even your voice. It can be difficult to act happy or take care of yourself following a bad breakup and when you're feeling so low, but this is one of the best ways that you can let your ex know you're doing just fine, and do not need to beg for his or her sympathy. You're going to get back together like adults who are mature and responsible if you are going to get back together at all.
Keep these tips in mind. Put a smile on your face (as hard as that might be), put a period at the end and move about your daily activities.
Want more relationship help?
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Best Books on Relationships - How to Choose?
If your ex has just broken up with you, you may be in the marketplace for books on relationships. But how do you choose the best books on relationships among the many offerings out there? Here’s how to choose. And the answer may surprise you.
But I've Studied This For So Long!
First, don’t be fooled by all those fancy letters after an author’s name. There are many people out there who find school to be a convenient escape from real life. Instead of engaging and socializing with people, they spend their time in the classroom and library away from the real world. As a result, they end up with a lot of letters after their names when they hit age 35 and use their degrees to indicate that they have “expert knowledge” of a situation. But does their expertise work in the real world?
Instead, look for books on relationships by authors who have been in the trenches. They’ve either put a bad relationship back together themselves or they’ve helped numerous buddies do the same. These aren’t therapy patients that come in for the “fifty-minute hour” either. These relationships are those of people the author cares deeply about.
"Take This Time to Find Yourself!"
Secondly, find books that don’t boil down to the proverbial “put the relationship aside for 30 days and work on yourself during that period” theory. This is in almost all of those “save your relationship” or “get your ex back” reports. Many of the ebooks on the internet turn that concept into 50-page fluff pieces. They don’t deserve your attention – or your hard-earned (especially these days) money.
Instead, look for the book that will give you new information that your good friends can’t give you.
For instance, will the book tell you what women/men crave most? Will it give you a step-by-step guide for how to give them that to them? Will the book show you how to recover from an affair? Will it give you specific techniques to get relief from your pain?
How Credible is the Information and the Writer?
Finally, look at who’s recommending the book. Are the testimonials a little too generic or were they written by the author’s brother and second cousin?
Find books on relationships that come recommended by a wide variety of people, in real and various situations, from all walks of life. If it looks like both an aristratic guy from England and a newly engaged woman from Kansas have used the book, chances are it will work for you, too.
Haven't Been There, Haven't Done That
There are many books on relationships out there. Unfortunately, a lot of them are drivel because they weren’t written by someone in the trenches or by someone who's been where you are and can give you some insight on the very things you’re looking for help with. As a result, they have generic advice that could be best summed up in a paragraph or two. Then, to top it off, what recommendations the book can give are generic in nature because the book really has nothing going for it. It has no substance.
Check It Out
Finding the best books on relationships can take a little work. Then again, everything about relationships takes work. As my grandma used to tell me, "Anything worth doing is worth doing well."
Shouldn’t you invest the time and money in the very best book out there on them?
Check out this site for more information. Cheering for you and wishing you success!
But I've Studied This For So Long!
First, don’t be fooled by all those fancy letters after an author’s name. There are many people out there who find school to be a convenient escape from real life. Instead of engaging and socializing with people, they spend their time in the classroom and library away from the real world. As a result, they end up with a lot of letters after their names when they hit age 35 and use their degrees to indicate that they have “expert knowledge” of a situation. But does their expertise work in the real world?
Instead, look for books on relationships by authors who have been in the trenches. They’ve either put a bad relationship back together themselves or they’ve helped numerous buddies do the same. These aren’t therapy patients that come in for the “fifty-minute hour” either. These relationships are those of people the author cares deeply about.
"Take This Time to Find Yourself!"
Secondly, find books that don’t boil down to the proverbial “put the relationship aside for 30 days and work on yourself during that period” theory. This is in almost all of those “save your relationship” or “get your ex back” reports. Many of the ebooks on the internet turn that concept into 50-page fluff pieces. They don’t deserve your attention – or your hard-earned (especially these days) money.
Instead, look for the book that will give you new information that your good friends can’t give you.
For instance, will the book tell you what women/men crave most? Will it give you a step-by-step guide for how to give them that to them? Will the book show you how to recover from an affair? Will it give you specific techniques to get relief from your pain?
How Credible is the Information and the Writer?
Finally, look at who’s recommending the book. Are the testimonials a little too generic or were they written by the author’s brother and second cousin?
Find books on relationships that come recommended by a wide variety of people, in real and various situations, from all walks of life. If it looks like both an aristratic guy from England and a newly engaged woman from Kansas have used the book, chances are it will work for you, too.
Haven't Been There, Haven't Done That
There are many books on relationships out there. Unfortunately, a lot of them are drivel because they weren’t written by someone in the trenches or by someone who's been where you are and can give you some insight on the very things you’re looking for help with. As a result, they have generic advice that could be best summed up in a paragraph or two. Then, to top it off, what recommendations the book can give are generic in nature because the book really has nothing going for it. It has no substance.
Check It Out
Finding the best books on relationships can take a little work. Then again, everything about relationships takes work. As my grandma used to tell me, "Anything worth doing is worth doing well."
Shouldn’t you invest the time and money in the very best book out there on them?
Check out this site for more information. Cheering for you and wishing you success!
Monday, August 31, 2009
Keeping Your Woman Happy - Ten Tips for the Guys
Do you know how to keep a woman happy? Besides just nodding your head and saying, "Yes, dear..."
Here's some relationship tips for the guys:
First, just be yourself.
Many men don’t feel that they're good enough to catch a beautiful, sexy woman, so they put on a show. Eau contraire!!! Guys, a confident (not talking about arrogance) man is the sexiest beast around. Have you ever noticed that some of the not-so-physically-handsome or yes, some of the ugliest guys have some of the prettiest women? That's because they display a level of confidence that is more attractive to women than physical looks.
Second, do the little things. They mean a lot.
Offering to take her car in for an oil change or giving her a bag of her favorite Jelly Bellies from time to time, is huge and very much appreciated when schedules are tight or the workday has turned into the day from h-e-double-hockeysticks. Sometimes men think in terms of "grand gestures," when it's the little things that add up to long relationships.
This segues into the next relationship: appreciate her.
Like you, we women don't appreciate being taken for granted. Let her know that you value her.
Keep your eyes on her.
Obviously, not looking at other women when you're with her should be close to the top of the list. This happened to me when I was on a date with a guy in college....so I gave him that tall, cool drink of water....right over his head. I would ask that you please keep the one you're with in mind for the sake of sheer propriety and respect.
When you're busy ogling, women think that you're comparing her to the woman you’re looking at. Women don't get "The-day-I-stop-looking-is-the-day-I-die theory." This comes from the innate/biological drive for monogamy in women. Women are looking for a lifetime partner, for a man with whom they can raise children. We can't help it. It's how we were created and designed. So minimize the ogling, especially when she’s around. Got it?
Next helpful hint: Try to make her laugh.
While men list good looks at the top of the things they need in a woman, women list a man’s sense of humor. So if you've got a great smile and can make us laugh, too? Baby, you've just moved to the head of the class!
Commonalities...
It’s great if you got together because of a hobby or an interest, but it still helps when you take an interest in a long-standing passion of hers.
If this means developing an appreciation for foreign films, so be it. This shows that you care about her and she’ll know you're one in a million.
Once you get the girl, it might seem like you don't have to try anymore – at least as far as grooming goes. ;) While women are less sensitive to looks than men are, they still like a man who at least makes the attempt. So, shave on the weekends. Please.
Keep in touch with the latest fashion trends for men.
In short, don’t get sloppy just because you’ve "landed" her. You can unland her just as easily.
She needs to know that she can integrate you into her circle of family and friends. A man must be part of her larger life, especially after the first few weeks of passion and flying around on Cloud 9 are over. So, make an effort to get along with her girlfriends and impress her parents. A woman relies on her social network to validate her relationship choices. Make the effort.
Be considerate of her feelings.
Women are less stable than guys. We're created with an overdose of emotion. Yes, part of this is hormonal. Like I said, it's how we're designed. When you're sensitive to her mood, you won’t get on her bad side.
Finally, be open to trying new things.
At the beginning of a relationship, everything is new from the types of dates you arrange to the way you kiss. But, after a while, these things become routine. If you find that your relationship has fallen into a rut, shake things up a bit and try something new. It will go a long way to keeping your relationship healthy.
So, there you have it. Ten little bits of advice on relationships to keep your dating life strong.
Look, guys, these things are common sense and the fact is I almost drove the love of my life out of my life because I didn't pay attention to what I was doing.
There's a book that woke me up that I stumbled upon written by T 'Dub' Jackson called, "The Magic Of Making Up." After I read it and started applying his common sense suggestions, the love life turned around. Not only that, all of my personal relationships with friends, co-workers and my family have become much smoother than they were before.
Was this helpful? Would you like know more? Check out this site for more info. Enjoy!
Here's some relationship tips for the guys:
First, just be yourself.
Many men don’t feel that they're good enough to catch a beautiful, sexy woman, so they put on a show. Eau contraire!!! Guys, a confident (not talking about arrogance) man is the sexiest beast around. Have you ever noticed that some of the not-so-physically-handsome or yes, some of the ugliest guys have some of the prettiest women? That's because they display a level of confidence that is more attractive to women than physical looks.
Second, do the little things. They mean a lot.
Offering to take her car in for an oil change or giving her a bag of her favorite Jelly Bellies from time to time, is huge and very much appreciated when schedules are tight or the workday has turned into the day from h-e-double-hockeysticks. Sometimes men think in terms of "grand gestures," when it's the little things that add up to long relationships.
This segues into the next relationship: appreciate her.
Like you, we women don't appreciate being taken for granted. Let her know that you value her.
Keep your eyes on her.
Obviously, not looking at other women when you're with her should be close to the top of the list. This happened to me when I was on a date with a guy in college....so I gave him that tall, cool drink of water....right over his head. I would ask that you please keep the one you're with in mind for the sake of sheer propriety and respect.
When you're busy ogling, women think that you're comparing her to the woman you’re looking at. Women don't get "The-day-I-stop-looking-is-the-day-I-die theory." This comes from the innate/biological drive for monogamy in women. Women are looking for a lifetime partner, for a man with whom they can raise children. We can't help it. It's how we were created and designed. So minimize the ogling, especially when she’s around. Got it?
Next helpful hint: Try to make her laugh.
While men list good looks at the top of the things they need in a woman, women list a man’s sense of humor. So if you've got a great smile and can make us laugh, too? Baby, you've just moved to the head of the class!
Commonalities...
It’s great if you got together because of a hobby or an interest, but it still helps when you take an interest in a long-standing passion of hers.
If this means developing an appreciation for foreign films, so be it. This shows that you care about her and she’ll know you're one in a million.
Once you get the girl, it might seem like you don't have to try anymore – at least as far as grooming goes. ;) While women are less sensitive to looks than men are, they still like a man who at least makes the attempt. So, shave on the weekends. Please.
Keep in touch with the latest fashion trends for men.
In short, don’t get sloppy just because you’ve "landed" her. You can unland her just as easily.
She needs to know that she can integrate you into her circle of family and friends. A man must be part of her larger life, especially after the first few weeks of passion and flying around on Cloud 9 are over. So, make an effort to get along with her girlfriends and impress her parents. A woman relies on her social network to validate her relationship choices. Make the effort.
Be considerate of her feelings.
Women are less stable than guys. We're created with an overdose of emotion. Yes, part of this is hormonal. Like I said, it's how we're designed. When you're sensitive to her mood, you won’t get on her bad side.
Finally, be open to trying new things.
At the beginning of a relationship, everything is new from the types of dates you arrange to the way you kiss. But, after a while, these things become routine. If you find that your relationship has fallen into a rut, shake things up a bit and try something new. It will go a long way to keeping your relationship healthy.
So, there you have it. Ten little bits of advice on relationships to keep your dating life strong.
Look, guys, these things are common sense and the fact is I almost drove the love of my life out of my life because I didn't pay attention to what I was doing.
There's a book that woke me up that I stumbled upon written by T 'Dub' Jackson called, "The Magic Of Making Up." After I read it and started applying his common sense suggestions, the love life turned around. Not only that, all of my personal relationships with friends, co-workers and my family have become much smoother than they were before.
Was this helpful? Would you like know more? Check out this site for more info. Enjoy!
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